Defining Joy

We flew to Nashville this morning for our 2nd trip this month. I always think it’s so weird to wake up in one state, jump on a plane, and an hour later be hundreds of miles from home..and still have a full day ahead of you. 

We got here, spent some time with Sarah and a bunch of her friends, such a great time, I love spending time with Nashvillians & hearing about their lives full of pursuing music. :) 

Had Pei Wei for dinner, I realized that Nashville has some of my favorite restaurants, if you’re here, you MUST go to Pei Wei, Sweet Cece’s, the Perch, Fido, & many other places that my brain can’t think of right now :P SUCH yummy food :) 

We found out that Maddi was nominated for the OAwards! Still not quite sure what that means but I guess it’s mtv’s award show for everything online…super excited :) 

We’re spending the weekend here writing, recording some demos, and having meetings; meaning I’ll have a good amount of free time on my hands, I’m hoping to come home with my sermon for Charis done, a wedding fully edited, & all my afrocka work up to date :) ….hopefully. 

God’s been SO good to me lately, seriously, every day He simply amazes me, I’ll write about that in another post…now to edit & try to get rid of this headache I’ve had all day :\ :) 

In the meantime, check out Maddi’s most recent video :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2gUYEhtBKg

<3

I just finished listening to an amazing teaching by Bill Johnson on the subject of Holiness, it really fanned a flame that was already growing inside of me regarding the subject of holiness. 

Over the summer, and anytime I’m not in a solid routine, it’s SO easy for me to at times forget about my relationship with God; to just let it slip by and focus on all my other friendships…. it’s pretty dumb of me; actually, cause God is really the only one who can carry everything..all my cares and worries, all my desires and needs, and yet SO many times I try to entrust these things to my friends around me, thinking that they’re capable of helping me through them. But in reality, ALL OF THEM put together wouldn’t compare to what God can & will do for me, it doesn’t compare to the fact that HE’S the only one who can carry me through difficult and overwhelming times. 

Last night, lots of frustration had built up inside of me, and I needed to release it, I found myself texting a few of my best friends venting to them about my frustrations, and in the back of my mind, I kept feeling that I needed to just open my journal and bible and talk to God about it, did I? No…i just kept venting away to my friend…. all that to say..it did help in getting me back on the right track, getting my heart back in the right place, but not NEARLY as much as it would’ve if I had just talked to God…and I know that for a fact. 

So many times it’s easy to forget that I can talk to Him anytime, anywhere, and so I forget..simply because He’s invisible, but I’m determined that from now on, I CAN’T let that be an obstacle to me talking to him and casting my cares on Him.

This morning in worship time at school, I finally took some time to let Him speak & pour His love on me, and it was then and only then that I felt my frustrations and concerns FULLY lift off of me, cause I decided to cast them on Him. 

Now you ask, what does all this have to do with pursuing holiness? ….I don’t really know..but hopefully it’ll come together by the end of this post…seeing as I’m just purely typing out my thoughts. :) 

Something I’ve realized lately is how much I let myself be consumed by media…music, news, people.com, all the gossip on facebook, etc. and I’m constantly convicted at how much time I’m wasting doing that..when I could be doing things that change the world, things that will last for eternity, deepening my relationship with God even more, etc. 

Yeah, you could say I’m kinda strict on what I listen to and watch, but man, I have a long way to go. 

Bill Johnson said something in his message that caught my eye, he said: “Holiness is the beauty of God’s nature shown through a person. Pursuing holiness shouldn’t be a “every sunday routine” it should be something that you’re constantly working on and doing, pursuing the beauty and nature of God to be shown THROUGH you.” 

I realized that if I want God to fully show through me, if I’m determined to pursue holiness as the bible says I should do, I need to cut out alot of things in my life that don’t line up with that. Things that distract me from that. 

I love that God’s helping my desire grow to spend time loving on him, to spend time worshipping him and soaking in His presence and just purely listening to Him, but there’s SO many areas that I still want to grow in so much, and I guess this message was just that slap in the butt that I needed. 

My desire is SO strong to pursue the things of Him, to surround myself with people who feel the same way, to help others join the pursuit, but it all starts with me…and the inside of me. 

I’m determined to let God cut the things away on me that are not of Him, that are not in the pursuit of holiness. Will I stumble and make mistakes? Of course. But you know what’s cool? Before God chose me, he factored in all my mistakes, and then He STILL chose me. and that, is a such a blessing and reassurance to have. 

:) 

I have so much to blog about. I don’t even know where to start. 

I started my last year of college today :) I’m excited for this year&at the same time interested to see how God works it all out, seeing as I have so much going on, that I don’t know how it’ll all fit in…I know He’ll work everything out&I’m excited to see what happens. :) 

I’ve been constantly reminded today/been constantly thinking about how I need to start saying no more, with school, mentoring groups, AFROCKA, my business, family, friendships, travelling, and everything else, I need to make sure that I don’t take on more than I can handle..but that ball’s in my court…I thought today about starting the worship team at school/being the worship leader, and then realized that I legit have no time for it…which is a weird thought for me, cause so often I tend to think I can do EVERYTHING… I’m coming to realize I’m not superwoman. ;) 

I feel so accomplished though, my finances are getting in order, my relationship with God is growing and thriving, my friendships are all different, some are struggles, some are on cloud 9, I’m getting my room & just the rest of my life in order..I’m always so happy to see God continuously at work in my heart. It’s so painful at times… but it’s all him just burning the chaf away on me…purifying me… and I’m willing & ready for it because I’m ecstatic for whats on the other side :) 

Time to lean more on him. 

Well, that was post full of a bajillion thoughts. & I still have so many more in my head….but oh well..that’s what tumblr’s for, right? :) 

Now time to go relax & have a bonfire with friends. loving this fall weather :)